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Who is in Control? An analogy for dependency management.

This is Arya. She is Alter Direction’s therapy puppy in training. Last week Arya had her spay surgery. When we picked her up from the vet the tech said, “You need to make sure she doesn’t run, jump or play rough for 2 weeks.” HA! Can you IMAGINE trying to contain a 65 pound German Shepherd puppy??? Arya did not disappoint. Once she recovered from the anesthesia, she was on the go! All of our efforts to keep her calm were for not. Commands to sit, lay down, slow down, keeping her on a leash…she just continued to run, jump, play AND began licking the wound. As you can see from her picture, Arya ended up with a cone to prevent her from opening her wound.

As I thought about the journey we have gone through with Arya over the last week, I noticed similar parallels in my journey through addiction. When I learned of my daughters addiction, I tried EVERYTHING I could think of to help her on her road to recovery. Unfortunately, my best efforts were not the answer to my daughter’s recovery. Her process towards recovery is HER journey to travel. Natural consequences and the pain and suffering addiction was causing in her life was the ultimate teacher.

As I looked at Arya after receiving her cone, I thought to myself how tough it is to allow the natural process of healing to take place in the lives of those we love. I worked hard during the weekend to limit or control Arya’s running and jumping and playing. As the mother of an addict, I spent almost 8 years trying to come up with a plan to beat the addiction that had taken control of my daughters life. One of the many lessons I’ve learned is that my ability to control a situation is merely an illusion. I could not intercede on my daughters behalf and save her from addiction any more than I can control the activity of a 65 pound puppy. Daily I’m presented with opportunities to trust the process of God’s plan in the lives of those I love. That is still tough some days.

For today, I renew my efforts and commit myself to trusting the process.

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